teenage dreamer

breaking.

2009-11-17T21:33:27Z

je hart, je ogen en je lichaam
in kleine stukjes aan de kant
want je leven is gebroken
maar je bestaan houdt nog steeds stand

je ogen dicht, je wangen nat
en je benen voellen gammel
in geen dagen niet gegeten
maar je maag laat geen gerammel

zorgen die je hoofd doen barsten
dit keer komt het nooit meer goed
tot je enkels in de tranen
dingen die je nooit meer doet

dichte neus en zere ogen
en die plekjes in je hoofd
die je het liefst zou vermijden
wachten tot je lichtje dooft.

maar ook al zijn je ogen nat
wangen pijnlijk schraal van 't huilen
en dingen die je mee moet torsen
met je leven mee moet zuilen

je komt de zon wel weer te boven
al lijkt heel de wereld vrolijk
je slikt, je kijkt het daglicht in
en weer is het even moeilijk

barst je weer in tranen laten
wordt er veel van je gevraagt
waarom doet de wereld hard
als jij het liever zachtjes laat

klikt het lichtje zachtjes uit
legt je hoofd weer in je handen
voelt de tranen al weer komen
en wiegt rustig heen en weer
je bent uitgeput en moe,
en je zorgen blijven knagen
maar heel rustig zak je in
wakker blijven kan niet meer.

erowyne @ 2008-08-31T18:08:00

2008-08-31T16:11:28Z

I know I haven't been around much, But I just wanted to show you guys my new WordPress Blog. I'm gonna put all my non-leather projects on there.

www.windsofmortals.com/eroWP

hugs!

erowyne @ 2008-07-05T14:33:00

2008-07-05T12:40:14Z

YOUR BOY SIDE:
[X] You love hoodies.
[X] You love jeans.
[] Dogs are better than cats
[X] Its hilarious when people get hurt.
[X] You've played with/against boys on a team.
[] Shopping is torture.
[] Sad movies suck.
[] You own a XBOX.
[] You own a Wii.
[X] You played with Hot Wheels as a little kid.
[X] At some point in life you wanted to be a firefighter.
[] You owned a DS, PS2 or Sega.
[X] You used to be obsessed with Power Rangers.
[] You watch sports on TV
[X] Gory movies are cool.
[] You go to your dad for advice.
[X] You own like a trillion baseball hats.
[] You used to/do collect football collector cards.
[X] Baggy sweatpants are cool to wear
[] Its kind of weird to have sleepovers with a bunch of people.
[X] Green, black, red, blue, or silver are one of your favorite colors.
[X] You love to go crazy and not care what other people think.
[X] Sports are fun.
[X] You talk with food in your mouth...
[X] You sleep at night with your socks on...
[] You have fished at least once.
Total: 15

YOUR GIRL SIDE
[X] You love to shop.
[X] You wear eyeliner.
[] You wear the color pink...--iew!
[X] You go to your mom for advice.
[X] You consider cheer leading a sport.
[] You hate wearing the color black.
[] You like going to the mall.
[] You like getting manicures and/or pedicures.
[X] You like wearing jewelry.
[] You cried watching The Notebook.
[] Skirts are a big parts of your wardrobe.
[] Shopping is one of your favorite hobbies.
[] You don't like the movie Star Wars.
[] You are/were in gymnastics.
[] It takes you around one hour to shower.
[] You smile a lot more than you should.
[] You have more than 10 pairs of shoes.
[X] You care about what you look like.
[] You like wearing dresses when you can.
[] You like wearing body spray/perfume.
[X] You like high heel shoes.
[X] You used to play with dolls as a kid.
[] You like putting makeup on others.
[] You like being the star of almost everything.
[] Pink is one of your favorite colors.--IEW!
Total: 8

hmmm, I have bigger boyish side then I should have:P

erowyne @ 2008-06-08T16:59:00

2008-06-08T15:01:14Z

Can't take it anymore.

grin.. gotta say it suits them..

2008-04-03T09:51:56Z

What Fairytale Characters Are Your LJ Friends?

LiveJournal Username

Are you male or female?

Pick your favorite fairytale of these:

Who do you root for?

Aurora's dress should be...

Do they really live happily ever after?

The beautiful Princess locked in a tower, waiting for her Prince.

gwenhyffar

The handsome, sword-wielding Prince, who lusts after the Princess.

patrickprince

The evil witch with an insanely annoying laugh and a dumb animal sidekick.

nell1i

Above mentioned dumb animal sidekick. But cute and furry nonetheless. ^^

satyrus

The feminist princess who escapes the tower, slays a dragon, and passionately takes the Prince.

nell1i

The comic relief. Enjoys running into trees, getting stomped on by dragons... hey, it's a life.

nell1i

The sexually frustrated King, who secretly lusts after the neighboring kingdom's Princess.

riftie

Chance that you will all live happily ever after:

This Fun Quiz created by Rissa at BlogQuiz.Net

Leo Horoscope at DailyHoroscopes.Biz

starlit eyes

2008-03-02T15:52:36Z

old entry of lanzaned's. the game is to put your media player on shuffle and answer these questions with the songs you get.

What does this year have in store for me?
play god - deathstars
does that mean I will be able to actually do things like i want them to be done?

What does your love life look like?
the misery - sonata arctica
I surely hope not..

What do I say when life gets hard?
9 crimes - damien rice
well, yeah.. it will get hard when I commit nine crimes

What do I think of when I get up in the morning?
the cage - sonata arctica
the world can be a cage, sometimes

What song will I dance to at my wedding?
hounds of love - kate bush
we'll probably be

What do you want as a career?
in the arms of the angels - sarah mclaughlin
indeed. something with fantasy and creativity

Your favorite saying?
final fantasy - first love
first love is beautifull

Favorite place?
running free - Iron maiden
being completely free

What do you think of your parents?
some day one day - queen
some day, one day, they'll understand me(I hope)

Where would you go on a first date?
ain't your fairytale - sonata arctica
if it works bitween me and him, it shouldn't matter where we go

Drug of choice?
a few small bruises - maria menah
me, a masochist?

Describe yourself:
two beds and a coffee machine - savage garden
euh?

What is the thing I like doing most?
field below - regina spector
dreaming.

The song that best describes the modern world?
spiders - System of a down
nothing is real, and everything is too real at the same time

What is my state of mind at the moment?
monster dream - whyte wolfe
..

How will I die?
blitzkrieg - Deathstars
ah well, at least I'll die fighting

The song that will be played at your funeral?
2gether now - limp bizkit
he will probably die before me, so in the afterlife we'll be together again

The song you'll put as the subject?
starlit eyes - system of a down

rofl

2008-02-18T19:14:42Z

I was looking around the Church. I was sitting far back enough so that the most of the mass was lost in the high, painted ceiling, among the cherubs and the gold leafing. The people around me were looking for God. There was one man reciting Hail Mary's, one after the other, not listening to the words he was saying. One woman was sitting there, weeping quietly. One or two were asleep.

They would never find God. There was only one way to find God, I knew, and that was to be looking for him out of the corner of your eye…

"Aha!" I yelled, standing up, turning around and pointing… Pointing at a man with a dirty mop in hand, and an overbite. One of the sleepers had roused. The priest at the front didn't miss a beat. "Sorry." I told the janitor. "I thought you were someone else."

The janitor watched the embarrassed man walk out quickly.

"That was too close." He said as he started scrubbing the tiles.

aha..

2007-11-29T16:24:56Z

Which Discworld Character are you like (with pics)
created with QuizFarm.com

You scored as The Librarian

Youâ€™re the Librarian! Once a wizard, now an Orang-utan (due to an unfortunate magical accident), you refuse to be turned back for a few reasons: In this form, itâ€™s easier to reach the shelves and hold more books; having the strength of five men makes people return their books on time; lifeâ€™s great philosophical questions boil down to â€œwhen do I get my next banana?â€¿ You say â€œookâ€¿ but are usually understood well enough.

The Librarian

88%

Gytha (Nanny) Ogg

69%

Cohen The Barbarian

63%

Death

56%

Esmerelda (Granny) Weatherwax

44%

Greebo

44%

Carrot Ironfounderson

38%

Commander Samuel Vimes

31%

Rincewind

31%

Lord Havelock Vetinari

13%

blah.

2007-11-25T13:09:39Z

I'm weak.

I fixed my fishy:)

2007-11-05T15:51:04Z

fish 2 is doing well:)

unfair..

2007-10-28T20:52:39Z

Ryukin, fish 2, is dying..

my room

2007-10-27T20:58:14Z

on request, some piccies of my room.

my bed..

my sitting space..

the tv I got from my parents, cuz they baught a flatscreen..

my pc space:

the stairs.

and my bathroom..

16 years old now..

2007-10-27T20:46:02Z

I know, long time no posts.

today I celebrated my 16th birthday.
It was wonderful. not too many people, not too empty either.

this is my favorite present:

there are two fishies in there.
in latin, they're called

Carrasius Auratus Buffelrug Ryukin Denekin.

that is why I am calling them Ryukin and Denekin, Ykin and Ekin for short.
appearantly, the kind of fish has balance problems because of the way they are built.
That is why they have food that sinks, floating food makes them swim up to the air to get it, and it may cause them to topple over. which is no good for the poor fishies.

here's a piccie of Denekin, Ryukin didn't want to pause in his swimming for the camera.

my other favorite pressie is a book with the songs and sonnets from shakespeare.
:)

love,

Simone.

morning..

2007-10-15T06:27:27Z

I got up at half past 6 this morning, ate pizza as breakfast(hawaii, mjum), and got seated here.
I'm quite tired, haven't slept that much, since my parents had to leave at 4.30 and forgot to talk softly.
held some icecubes to my eyes already, hope it helped. I didn't really see the difference.

I started in this school in the beginning of september, and It's been tiring me out both mentally and physically. the physical reason is probably the same as last year(tired and not knowing why) and the mental reason is because of the people there. The students are nice and help me find wherever I need to go, but the teachers and concierges really get me angry.
I never got a rulelist or talk to begin with. I've requested it a few times now, but noone seems to listen.

because of that, i've been on the 'meldlijst' 2 times now. it's a list with student's names that hangs on the wall close to the entrance. You get your name on the thing if you've done something wrong and need to have detention.
the first time I was on it, a classmate pointed it out to me. I didn't even know what the fuck it was, let alone why I was on it. appearantly, it's a rule to always have your schoolcard with you. I didn't have it with me when the photos were to be made. but hell, I didnt even HAVE one yet.
so I visited the coordinator's office. I had to wait till he was done talking to someone, and after about half an hour I could go in and tell my story. with a reprimanding look, he told me it was alright for now.

The second time, I put my bike in front of the school instead of behind it. I was not the only student who did that, and I didn't know it was not okay to do so.
When I wanted to go home, my bike was chained to the other bikes, and they told me I could get it off at 6 o'clock again. I did not just agree to that.
At such points I am glad that I am not as shy as I was a few years ago. I calmly told the concierges that noone ever told me I couldn´t park my bike there, and if they would please enlighten me about the rules.
one of them stayed stubborn. he was angry. "for what other reason would we have a place to put your bike BEHIND the school?" I told him I would gladly obey to this rule, if I had just known it. the other one thankfully gave in and unchained my bike from the rest.
But I still haven't got my rules..

I am planning to send an email to miss. kloosterman. She was the one to show me around the school in the first place, and she really seems to listen to what the students tell her. All I'm going to request is a proper ruleslist or speech, so the new students would know the rules. I'll point out everything i've tripped over to her.

so. Hope this will help. Just called my mom and asked if I could stay home.
thankfully, I can.

ad now I'm going to SLEEP

Erowyne.

he can be cute like that..

2007-07-18T18:14:53Z

yay!

2007-07-15T15:48:24Z

^^

2007-06-27T18:04:23Z

I've started knitting again.

thank gwenhyffar and nell1i for inspiring me!

zucht..

2007-06-26T08:50:55Z

brak, moe, en gekwetst.

ik heb een paar weken geleden schoolspullen voor het nieuwe jaar gehaald aangezien ik daar later weinig thuis voor heb ivm de verhuizing etc.
heb mijn moeder de bonnetjes laten zien en het was prima. vanochtend checkte ze op internet haar rekeningen, en zag die dus staan, ze kan zich niet meer herrinderen dat ik het haar verteld of laten zien heb en beweert dat ik haar geld loop te spenderen zonder het te zeggen. met opmerken als: zo kan ik je toch niet vertrouwen!, dit vind ik erg kinderachtig, liegen dat je het me laten zien hebt! en ik betaal je schoolspullen al niet meer! waardoor ik dus behoorlijk in de geldproblemen zou komen.

hoe meer ik haar mijn verhaal probeer te vertellen, hoe bozer ze schijnt te worden. fijn.

ik kan er gewoon op het moment niet bij dat ik mijn best doe iets netjes te doen, en dat ik daar later alsnog bonje over krijg, terwijl ik naar mijn weten niks fout heb gedaan.

zucht.

Simone.

breken

2007-06-08T15:25:19Z

je hart, je ogen en je lichaam
in kleine stukjes aan de kant
want je leven is gebroken
maar je bestaan houdt nog steeds stand

je ogen dicht, je wangen nat
en je benen voelen gammel
in geen dagen niet gegeten
maar je maag laat geen gerammel

zorgen die je hoofd doen barsten
dit keer komt het nooit meer goed
tot je enkels in de tranen
dingen die je nooit meer doet

dichte neus en zere ogen
en die plekjes in je hoofd
die je het liefst zou vermijden
wachten tot je lichtje dooft.

maar ook al zijn je ogen nat
wangen pijnlijk schraal van 't huilen
en dingen die je mee moet torsen
met je leven mee moet zuilen

je komt de zon wel weer te boven
al lijkt heel de wereld vrolijk
je slikt, je kijkt het daglicht in
en weer is het even moeilijk

barst je weer in tranen laten
wordt er veel van je gevraagd
waarom doet de wereld hard
als jij het liever zachtjes laat

klik het lichtje zachtjes uit
leg je hoofd weer in je handen
voel de tranen al weer komen
en wieg rustig heen en weer
je bent uitgeput en moe,
en je zorgen blijven knagen
maar heel rustig zak je in
wakker blijven kan niet meer.

voor TB.

written with my bad days in mind, knowing that a very good friend is now experiencing pain that is a thousand times as bad.

Simone.

no pfeiffer!

2007-05-08T09:33:46Z

well, the result of the bloodtest is negative. no pfeiffer.
then ofcourse the question is:
what is it then?
it's nothing serious, according to the txtmessage my mother send me..
well, anyway, I'll just stay home, drink tea and sleep LOADS

hugs!

schoolshit

2007-05-07T19:57:51Z

have to write an english song for school.
's hard.
I don't want anything too..revealing..
but still, I want it to be good.

the eyes of a stranger
that look your way
teary eyed and depressed
so much to say

are you so alone then?
got noone at home?
noone to care
no friends on the phone?

how did you get so lonely, dear stranger
where did you loose your family
or are you all alone?

your sisters, your brothers,
everyone that cared
did you push them away?
are you scared?

let me share your pain stranger
can't I listen and hear
can't I give you a reason
take away all your fears

but no, my dear stranger
you look and you hide
afraid of my eyes
that they'll burn you inside

how did you get so lonely, dear stranger
where did you loose your family
or are you all alone?

afraid to be helped
all I do mean is good
goodbye my dear stranger
if I understood..

so..tell me, what do you think of it, is it good enough?

hugs!

Erowyne

PS:tomorrow I'll hear the results of my bloodtest..

WHY ME?

2007-05-04T15:01:14Z

fijn. ik heb meivakantie deze week, en ik ben actief medewerker van het bevrijdingsfestival overijssel.
dit jaar niet dus. dit weekend begon het met brandende keelpijn en hoofdpijn op mijn slapen, en nu zit ik hier met een keelontsteking, een oogontsteking, koppijn bij mijn slapen, verhoging, en dus waarschijnlijk pfeiffer.
ik was de laatste weken al abnormaal moe, terwijl ik erg veel sliep voor mijn doen.
woensdag is er bloed afgenomen en begin volgende week horen we de uitslag.
keelontsteking, dikke ogen, koppijn bij je slapen en lichte koorts zijn allemaal symptomen van pfeiffer.
daarbei gezien dat nog steeds na een dag thuiszitten om een uur of 9 mijn hele lichaam niet meer wil, en het wel lijkt alsof ik 20 km gerend heb.
ik slaap constant de klok rond, maar het schijnt allemaal niks te helpen.
zit ik hier nog te hopen dat ik straks maandag weer naar school kan, maar ik zie zelf de kansen eigenlijk klein in. als ik ga en mijn ogen zijn nog zo geirriteerd, dan kan ik maar beter een briefje halen bij de rektor, met toestemming om de hele dag een zonnebril te dragen, ook in de klas.
maar als ik de hele schoolweek vol wil houden..
dan moet ik elke avond toch om zo ongeveer 7 uur naar bed gaan, wat ik dus niet van plan ben.
ik ga niet mijn hele leven om school heen bouwen omdat ik anders te moe wordt.

maar goed, volgende week dus de uitslag.
aan de ene kant wil ik wel dat we eindelijk eens weten wat het is, aan de andere kant is pfeiffer behoorlijk kut.

huggles!(en nee ik zal niet in je gezicht hoesten)

grin..

2007-04-27T18:21:09Z

'What will your obituary say?' at QuizGalaxy.com

after-fun-dip

2007-04-23T08:19:00Z

and me thinking I'd only have this after larps.

I had a fabulous weekend, really lovely..
saturday I went to the fantasy fair with some friends of mine..we had a nice idea made up for it: me and roos (one of the friends) wore aprons with the text: *come to the darkside, we've got cookies* and we both had a basket full of cookies..which we gave to the peeps walking around there. The people loved the idea, and there were made hell a lot of photos:D we'll even be in the elffantasy magazine:D
somewhere around 7 we went 'home' after first entering a mcdonalds and finally eating something. I was dizzy and trembling by the time, since I hadn't had that much food at all.
sunday we went to the deathstars concert, and I loved it. the guys were fantastic, and the funplay bitween skinny and cat was cool.
at 8, my parents picked me up at the just ended concert, and in the car I already felt the drowsy feeling of a dip coming up. how nice.
when I woke up today I didn't feel much better, and I didn't go to school. feel broken and I miss the peeps like hell.

it will pass, it will pass...

Erowyne.

just lovely

2007-04-16T13:07:55Z

1 - Tell you why I friended you.
2 - Associate you with something. A fandom, a song, a colour, a piece of fruit. SOMETHING.
3 - Tell you something I like about you.
4 - Tell you a memory I have of you.
5 - Associate you with a breed of dog.
6 - Ask something I've always wanted to know about you.
7 - Tell you my favorite user pic of yours.
8 - In retort, you must spread this disease in your LJ (if you want).

*teenage dreamer*

breaking.

erowyne @ 2008-08-31T18:08:00

erowyne @ 2008-07-05T14:33:00

erowyne @ 2008-06-08T16:59:00

grin.. gotta say it suits them..

starlit eyes

rofl

aha..

blah.

I fixed my fishy:)

unfair..

my room

16 years old now..

morning..

he can be cute like that..

yay!

^^

zucht..

breken

no pfeiffer!

schoolshit

WHY ME?

grin..

after-fun-dip

just lovely

teenage dreamer